The 5 Most Common Dreams of Women in Committed Relationships

For most of us women, relationships take up the lion's share of our lives, so it would stand to reason that our conscious, as well as our subconscious, minds are absorbed with relationship thoughts, strategies, tools to hook him, understand him -- sometimes even make him over.

Most of our nocturnal sojourns are a constant stream of subtle (or blatant as a foghorn) clues to navigate the sea of love in the most opportune way. The following are the five most common dreams among committed women and how they might assist you in making your relationship more sea-worthy:

Driving in a Car Together
What it means: Time to make plans for the next leg of your journey.
Driving in a car in a dream represents your body, your identity, as well as the status of your relationship. If you are driving, then you've got the "drive" to take the wheel of your relationship's direction. Basically, you are the Alpha -- in control. However, if your partner is driving the car (even though you know you are capable), you are letting him be the "man with the plan" -- allowing him to be in charge. This dream may be telling you it's time to consult your relationship's GPS and make sure you are aligned on your plans for the future.

Sharing a Meal Together
What it means: Feed your relationship the nutrients it hungers for (time, attention, romance ... sex?)
Dreams of food represent nourishment and influence, making it the perfect metaphor for what you are "feeding" your relationship. You may be hungering for a certain type of nurturing and affection in your relationship. If you are the one dishing it out on a silver platter, you're the one giving the TLC. If you are eating the food, you are receiving the nourishment, energy, stimulation, and/or praise. If you both enjoy the meal you are sharing in your dream, then you have a recipe for success (i.e., the two of you are "ingesting" shared values, customs and belief systems).

Overcoming Obstacles Together
What it means: Don't give up!
If you dream of being Indiana Jones & Joanne in your dreams, ducking beneath tidal waves, side-stepping earthquakes, parachuting to safety through an avalanche, then you've probably been going through a major troubling period together. If you make it through the drama together in your dream, then your relationship is strong in good weather and in foul. Your dream may be forecasting that once you emerge victorious from your current drama you will soon reap the benefits of your ability to unite through difficult times, making your bond unbreakable. Some of the best relationships are forged in the heat of life's greatest challenges.

Playing the Field
What it means: Time to take the monotony out of monogamy
Don't be alarmed -- it doesn't mean what you think. Dreams of SWOP (sex with other people) symbolize your desire, creativity and passion. (Aren't you relieved?) Consider that these dreams might be helping you to express your unsatisfied or secret physical attractions, longings and desires -- in a completely "safe" arena where no one gets hurt! Dreams of intercourse also represent connection, acceptance, affinity, love and the embracing and melding of the qualities of the person or people involved in the act. So, if you dream of having sex with, say, Jeffery Dean Morgan, you are reaching out and touching (figuratively speaking) an idyllic masculine (i.e., strong, capable, heroic) aspect of yourself. The same holds true if your beloved is gallivanting around town (in his dreams) with Kim Kardashian.

Getting Married
What it means: Preview of coming attractions
Dreams of marriage represent integration and the embrace of opposites, as well as a possible rehearsal for your actual big day! Your subconscious mind may be helping you to prepare for this potential life-altering event, or it could be prepping for a deeper level of commitment.

If you dream of marrying or of being married to an ex, it may simply mean that you are realizing your profound connection to a cherished part of YOU that was prominent back then. Also, you may be highlighting the wisdom you earned and learned from your past intimate entanglements.

Dream Interpretation -- a Roller Coaster Ride Through College

Dear Kelly,

I have dreams that I am in college and I get in the elevator and it moves around like a roller coaster. Not just up and down, but sideways and on a track in all directions. What does that mean?

Thanks,
Dara Turetsky-Blaker

Kelly says:

Dear Dara,

In my experience, dreams of college represent that you are learning, growing and developing a "degree" of mastery and authority in your life. The fact that you dream of getting into an elevator at school symbolizes that you are elevating rapidly within the realm of your core life lessons, and perhaps desiring to move up in the world as well.

My hunch about you is that you are seeking the fast track to success. However, because you dream your elevator is more like a roller coaster, instead of gaining success in a linear fashion, moving from point A to point B, you are going up, down, and side-to-side. Perhaps your dream is showing you that in order to attain your next level of growth and success, you need to gain mastery of the buttons and levers of your life (i.e., your goals, desires, and intentions). Become mindful of tumultuous emotions, mood swings, distractions, and/or anything that could hook your attention and move you off-track from where you truly want to go.

Alternatively, your dreams may be showing you to let go of your attachment to the way success is supposed to look, and with your adventurous spirit in tow put your hands in the air, toss out the map, and enjoy the ride of your life.

What Your Bad Dreams Really Mean -- A Dream Doctor Decodes Them!

Dear Kelly,

I had a strange dream I was on the Titanic! I was wearing a beautiful dark blue dress and was walking hand and hand with a handsome man I'd just met. We were kissing and talking about kids and marriage. I can remember every detail...it was a dark, beautiful night, and the stars lit up the sky. He told me his name was Paul, he pulled me close, and I laid my head on his shoulder. I was happy beyond comprehension.

Just then the Titanic hit something (an iceberg?) and we both fell on the floor. I was frightened until Paul reassured me everything would be all right, and then he disappeared before my eyes! Everything went black and I woke up feeling startled, heartbroken, and in a cold sweat.

The strangest thing is I remember having a similar Titanic nightmare like this last year. What does this dream mean and why do these bad dreams keep happening to me? I've never hurt anyone and I'm a good person. I spend my days focused on helping people and only doing positive things, so why me? What did I do to deserve these bad dreams?

Help!

Heartbroken on the Titanic

Dear Heartbroken,

Your timing is very synchronistic. Just today I was talking with my friend's son who was researching the Titanic for a school project! He asked, "I wonder what those people must have felt as the boat hit the iceberg?" Don't you love synchronicities?

First of all I'd put your dreams in the "venting dream" category whereby your subconscious mind is helping you to flush away your fears and doubts about your love boat sailing into the shores of your heart.

Nightmares (venting dreams) happen to everyone...even the best people on the planet. I'd bet a million bucks Mother Theresa had plenty of them! Consider you may be dreaming (venting) out drama for other people in your life with whom you are psychically connected. Think of it as doing laundry for a clueless friend.

You can, however, stop the spin cycle of your recurring dream. You can do this by practicing the art of IRT (Imagery Rehearsal Therapy), a process by which you:

A.) Re-envision your dream in the waking state.
B.) Imagine redirecting your dream to unfold in a way you would have preferred (i.e. you and Paul land safely on dry land, get married, have babies, grow old together, and walk hand and hand into the sunset after a full and happy life together).
C.) Repeat several times until the nightmare literally becomes a sweet dream.

For example, my niece Noel had recurring dreams of being chased by a vampire. She re- envisioned the dream and asked the vampire why it was chasing her. The vampire (in her newly imagined dream) told her he was lonely and needed a friend...at which point Noel put her arms around the pathetic blood-sucker and told him she would be his friend...from a distance. He agreed...and she hasn't had another dreamtime visitation from him since.

Back to your dream... I would suggest you open to the possibility of the Titanic getting hit as a sign for all your relationship baggage from the past going down (not your hopes and dreams). If a venting dream is allowed to do its job properly (without you continuing to recycle the pain) then you are left with a clean deck to create and "dream" up what you truly desire.

If I were you I would take heart in remembering Paul told you "Everything would be alright", which might be code for, "...even though this particular ship (burdened by all your past baggage) is going down, we are connected and as Celine Dion sang (and I paraphrase) 'Our hearts will go on'."

Thank you for sharing your dream with me...may there be sweet sailing tonight!

Kelly

10 Most Popular 21st-Century Dream Symbols -- And What They Mean

In our fast-paced world of globalization, double half-caff-low-cal-no-whip-soy mochachinos, news alerts, tweets and turbo-speed Internet access, our dreams are working overtime to keep us sane.

Our unedited, unscripted, unrated, uncensored, graphic, high-speed, high-tech, sometimes-violent and XXX dreams toss out the G-rated niceties of our public persona. In our nighttime dream theater, our small voice of intuition and authenticity gets a bullhorn and runs the show without constraints.

Dancing wildly in the grey matter of today's dreamer are such symbols as: blog, life coach, laptop, Twitter, terrorist, eBay, Tivo and Starbucks. Instead of a horse and carriage, a modern dreamer might dream of a fuel-efficient hybrid car zipping past gridlock traffic in a HOV lane. Instead of penning a letter with a quill, you might dream of sitting in an Internet cafe emailing a friend. Instead of surfing the ocean blue, you might dream of surfing the Web and meeting Mr. or Mrs. Right on Match.com. Understanding the symbolism behind these 21st-century words will help you keep up with your dreams that are trying desperately to keep up with you!

After the jump, the top 10 dream symbols today's dreamer dreams about most -- explained.

10. Spam
Dreams about spam signify a lack of boundaries and that you are being inundated with energy that you don't want from people that you don't enjoy. If this is the case, then your dream is giving you permission to set clear boundaries with people in your life. If you dream of being the one sending the spam, then this could be a message for you to reestablish integrity in your communication and be more respectful of other people's boundaries.

9. Oprah
A dream about Oprah Winfrey represents altruism, inspiration, and that you are exalting your gifts for the benefit of all. Synonymous with Oprah is "Remember your spirit"; becoming all that you can be, materially, physically, and spiritually.

8. IVF
Dreams of In Vitro fertilization represents that you are asserting your will in the creation of a baby, project, or relationship. You are not taking "No" for an answer with regards to the obstacles and challenges you face in creating and fulfilling your desires.

7. iTunes/iPod
Because music represents a medium that greatly influences feelings, moods, attitudes and thoughts, dreams of an I-pod represent that your ability to have mastery and control of your emotions, moods and thoughts is in the palm of your hand.

6. Match.com
Dreams about match.com (or any Internet dating website) represent your desire to meet someone special and to expand your circle of possibilities. This dream also signifies your awareness that you are connected to a much larger playing field than your normal day to day reality. You are looking for love, feeling lucky, and hopeful that love is on the way.

5. eBay
Dreams about shopping or selling on E-Bay represent your connection with the world and with unlimited opportunity. Pay attention to the feeling tone of this dream to see whether it is telling you to monitor your shopping, or to prepare for a great opportunity. Consider what you are shopping for, what you are selling, and/or if retail therapy is really going to fix you.

4. Hybrid Car
Dreams about a fuel efficient car represent a desire to conserve energy, and are an indication that you are globally aware, mature, responsible, conscious, and mindful of natural resources, namely your natural resources (time and money).

3. Email/Internet
Dreams about e-mail represent communication and a desire to reach out and touch someone. E-mail can also represent a kind of aloof intimacy and/or unwanted communication. Dreams of the internet represent having the world at your fingertips, and your connectivity to everything, everyone, all the time; a net in which all solutions you seek are caught.

2. Text Message / IM
Dreams of a text message signify a desire to connect and to stay in touch with someone from afar. You have a desire to get to the point, clarity, and to spell out what it is you want to communicate.

1. Cell Phone (iPhone, Blackberry)
Dreams of a cell phone represent telepathic communication. Significant aspects of this dream are the person you are calling, and/or who is calling you, whether or not you are able to reach him or her, and the status of your connection (four bars, three, two or one, or none). What you say or what is being said is of utmost importance.

'Dream Clubs' Are the New Book Clubs -- Only Men Attend, Too

Forget golfing, sailing or Match.com. According to The New York Times, 32-year-old Lily Michaud, of Portland, Oreg., met her husband in a "dream club."

Yes, as in a gathering at which people meet to dissect their dreams.

"I learned about my friends' lives at a depth you don't often get in casual conversation," Michaud, a registered nurse and photographer, told the paper. "It wasn't as though I was getting more personal details, so much as understanding the complexity of their emotional reactions to life events."

It only got awkward, she said, "when someone dreamed about someone else in the club." We bet.

It seems dream clubs are popping up all over Craigslist and Meetup, from Iowa to L.A. Most are co-ed, and they're often led by a therapist, shaman or dream coach. Some participants say diving deep into their dreams with a room full of near strangers is the perfect antidote to friendship in the age of the status update. And some groups actually engage in dreamwork, which looks a lot like building dioramas of your nocturnal dramas.

In the interim, food is served. Which is the only reason we can dream up for straight guys being there to begin with.

Can Your Dreams Make You Rich? They Did for the 'Twilight' Creator

In his mega-bestselling book, "Think & Grow Rich" Napoleon Hill interviewed and researched over 500 of the most successful people in history to determine what common attributes they shared that allowed them to create such prosperity and purpose-driven lives. Can you guess one attribute they all had in common?

They all had highly attuned intuition (aka, the ability to tap into their gut feelings and act on their inner-guidance).

Can you guess one of the best-kept secrets to building your intuition muscles?

Dream Recall
In these economic times we can no longer rely on external structures: the stock market, and banking systems are crumbling, the automotive industry and housing markets are falling apart.

When all else fails, turn within.

People claim they can't afford the time to pay attention to their dreams...I say you can't afford not to. What if the goldmine you have been praying for is not in your backyard, but under your pillow?

Stephenie Meyer was a stay-at-home mom who dabbled with writing from time to time -- and was certainly not into vampire stories at all. However, one night, she had a dream about a benevolent and hot (as in handsome) vampire who was captivated by the scent of an average girl. This dream was so vivid that Stephenie began to write what became the mega-hit, Twilight. This led to the next in the Twilight series...then the next...then the next...and the rest is her-story. Can you imagine what would have happened if she had shrugged it off as "just a dream?"

Is this phenomenon relegated to just a select few people in this world with especially good karma?

Absolutely not!

I believe it is special when a person has this kind of dream -- but not unusual. It happens from time to time to everyone...even for those whose karma is questionable. After the jump, a few great examples of dreams from ordinary folks (and a few superstars) that made them wealthy, healthy, or famous...

Thomas Jefferson's writing the Declaration of Independence:
Some historians, including author Robert Moss, attribute the writing of the Declaration of Independence and the philosophy contained within to the descriptive nighttime dreams of both Thomas Jefferson and John Adams. Dr. Benjamin Rush, the physician attending both ex-presidents, during the eleven years of their estranged friendship (due to irreconcilable political differences) acted as a dream bridge between the two. By the way, as you can imagine, this was quite unusual (and even scandalous) for men of power at this time to openly discuss such metaphysical ideologies.

History's biggest oil discovery: In September 1937 the Kuwait Oil Company was unsuccessfully drilling in Bahra...until one night, Colonel Harold Dickson dreamed of a beautiful woman buried in an underground tomb. In his dream the Colonel rescued the damsel in distress, fed her and gave her warm clothes. To repay his kindness she led her hero to an ancient sidr tree, growing alone in the desert. Upon awakening, Colonel Dickson discovered the exact location of this particular tree and shared it with the Sheikh of Kuwait who redirected drilling operations to the area near the lonely tree. Within a few months the Kuwait Oil Company hit on what became the one of the richest oil discoveries in history.

The Invention of the Sewing Machine: In his waking life, inventor, Elias Howe, was struggling to figure out how to make a needle cut through a piece of cloth on the sewing machine he was creating. He decided to "sleep on it" and his dream came to the rescue, "I was taken prisoner by a group of natives. They were dancing around with spears. As they were moving around me, I noticed their spears all had holes near their tips." Even though he was frightened when he awoke, he realized that by placing a hole at the tip of the needle, the thread could be caught after pushing through the cloth. Eurika! He changed his design to incorporate the dream idea and found it worked! This is one dream for which my grandmother is particularly grateful (and for those of us who don't live in a nudist colony).

Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein": During the rainy summer of 1816, at the ripe old age of 18, Mary Shelley dreamed of "...a pale student of unhallowed arts kneeling beside the thing he had put together. I saw the hideous phantasm of a man stretched out, and then, on the working of some powerful engine, show signs of life, and stir with an uneasy, half vital motion. Frightful must it be; for SUPREMELY frightful would be the effect of any human endeavor to mock the stupendous mechanism of the Creator of the world." With the urgings of Lord Byron, Mary Shelley wrote her Frankenstein nightmare down and expanded it into what is now considered a landmark work of Science Fiction, Romantic and Gothic literature.

Otto Loewi's Nobel Prize: Elias Howe's invention of the sewing machine: Dr. Otto Loewi's dream took place in a laboratory. There were two frog hearts placed apart from one another, the first with its nerves, the second without. In his dream he had the hunch it was not the nerves that influenced the heart directly...but the chemical substance being transmitted between the nerves. Upon awakening Dr. Loewi conducted an experiment proving the theory of chemical transmission (later identified as acetylcholine) of the nerve impulse. In 1936, Dr Loewi was awarded the Nobel Prize for his discovery.

Jack Nicklaus's golf swing: Golf legend, Jack Nicklaus, attributes his success in part to a dream he had in which he was gripping a golf club differently than he normally did. In real life he'd been having trouble collapsing his right arm and taking the club head away from the ball. However, in his dream, with this new grip, he was swinging perfectly. When he practiced his "dream grip" in real life it worked. "I feel kind of foolish admitting it," said Nicklaus, "but it really happened in a dream."

Paul McCartney's "Yesterday": The song "Yesterday" serenaded its way into Sir Paul McCartney's dream. McCartney was snoozing in his parent's home in London during the 1965 filming of the Beatle's Help! "I woke up with a lovely tune in my head. There was an upright piano next to me. I got out of bed, sat at the piano, found G, found F sharp minor 7th -- and that leads you through then to B to E minor, and finally back to E. It all leads forward logically. I thought, 'No, I've never written anything like this before.' But I had the tune, which was the most magic thing!" Exclaimed McCartney. According to the Guinness Book of Records, "Yesterday" (1965) has the most cover versions of any song ever written and, according to Broadcast Music Inc (BMI), was performed over seven million times in the 20th century.

James Cameron's "Avatar": One morning, in 1995, award winning film director James Cameron awoke breathless from an epic dream whereby he had visited a land called, "Pandora". In this rainforest-like dreamscape the people were an enlightened hybrid of aliens and humans, speaking a language that was foreign, yet understandable to him. Luckily for James Cameron (and Avatar fans worldwide) he respected his dream world and took copious notes. Ten years and several technological quantum leaps later, Cameron's dusty dream notes served as a travelogue for the entire production...a world that Cameron had already visited. "Avatar", released during the '09 Holiday season, with a $250 million dollar budget (the biggest movie budget in movie making history), has grossed over 1.686 billion dollars, and counting.

Worm Interupted: My husband dreamed about a worm being pulled out of his forehead. A few days later he went to the dermatologist who immediately was able to extract a rare "worm like" form of skin cancer-just in the nick of time.

If you are still not sold on the fact that your dreams can catapult your life to riches, stardom, and/or your greatest contribution to humanity (or at least a bit of guidance as to what outfit to wear on your date tomorrow night)...then consider this to be your wake up call. Perhaps tonight will be the night when you stop taking your dreams lying down!

Perhaps the dream you have tonight will be your breakthrough to solve your problems, catapult you to stardom or lead you to your very own gold mine.

Ka-Ching! What Dreams About Money Really Mean

"Money dreams" symbolize issues of energy, power, survival and resourcefulness. Even if you are Paris Hilton (don't worry, neither am I), money is an issue you have to deal with in a very real way in your life whether you're awake or asleep.

Be honest: Have you ever tossed and turned at night over an overdue debt, jolted awake in a cold sweat dreaming of a lost purse ... or awoken with a smile because you dreamed of an unexpected windfall? OK, the latter isn't as popular a dream as the first two, but I would assert we've all had a financial "win" dream ... even if we left it in dreamland and forgot to deposit it in our long-term memory bank.

In most money dreams, you're either chasing it, losing it, spending it, finding it, fighting for it, hiding it or reveling in it. You don't have to be Carl Jung (the psychologist who, in my opinion, surpassed Sigmund Freud as the godfather of dream interpretation) to realize these dreams are a reflection of our real life fears, struggles, attitudes and beliefs about the mighty green.

More than just revealing our dysfunctional fears and phobias about money, these dreams are our friends because, if we look closely, they give us hints and clues as to how to discover our own path to gold. For example, in 1937 Colonel Harold Dickson's nighttime dream revealed the clues that led him to his first major oil discovery (which later became the Kuwait Oil Company). More modern examples resulted in the goldmines known as "Avatar," "Twilight" and Monster.com.

Below are a few snapshots of money dreams recently sent to me from non–Paris Hilton types. Maybe they'll trigger your own memory bank:

"In my dream I'm carting about a wheelbarrow filled with money, and no matter how carefully I walk, the money keeps falling out."

You're thinking way too small, being way too controlling ... and it's not working!

I believe this dream is telling you that the way you are going about making/getting/earning money is antiquated, unstable and out of balance, not to mention stressful! My advice is to embrace 21st-century financial options, and perhaps invest in a more modern "vehicle" by which you allow money to move in and through your life.

"I'm at a grocery store at the register ready to check out. I search for my credit card in my purse and it's missing!"

Stop checking out!

Your dream may be telling you to be more aware of mindless spending. A "credit" card may also be symbolic of giving credit where it is due. Where do you discredit yourself, and where are you withholding deserved praise? Stop sleepwalking regarding your financial affairs. Be more conscious, aware and awake when it comes to the checks and balances of your energy and keep in mind what you appreciate appreciates.

"I'm on a shopping spree and I feel like Queen Midas. Everything I find fits and looks great on me ... and is in my favorite colors. It's amazing!"

You are at a choice!

You're shopping for the things in life that energetically fit you to a tee -- identifying what you want to spend your time and energy on (relationships, investments, belief systems you've been buying into). This is considered a wish-fulfillment dream. Sometimes these dreams play during times when we are living in the "lack shack" consciousness, in order to move you (energetically) toward the consciousness of your "mansion of expansion."

"I just bought my dream car, and I'm feeling ecstatic as I cruise down the highway having a great time."

You're in the driver's seat of your life ... and you're going places!

Consult your internal GPS to become clear about where you want to go, why you want to go there, and the best way of arriving joyously at your destination. You clearly have the drive to take you there. Identify your "vehicle" (project, relationship, or opportunity), make sure it is aligned with your life's direction, then get into gear to accelerate its manifestation.

'I open my purse and discover it's filled with cash. I hear myself say, "I must have won the lottery!"'

Ka-ching!

Winning the lottery or coming into a windfall is another wish-fulfillment dream. Your subconscious mind cannot discern between actual events and that which is vividly imagined, so your wish-fulfillment dreams create an energetic map that can lead you from where you are to where you would like to be. Just as people who are wealthy attract more wealth and happy people attract more circumstances to themselves that make them happy, allow this heightened state to make you magnetic to the "real life" fulfillment of your desires. Let this dream be good luck regarding your health, wealth and/or relationships -- a message that you are on track. And if you actually saw lottery numbers in your dream, by all means write them down and give them a spin (or at the very least, give them to me). This won't be the first time someone dreamed of winning lottery numbers!

Let Me Sleep On It: How Dreams Can Help Your Problems Disappear

It doesn't seem so strange that most artists I know are avid dreamers. Perhaps by virtue of their profession (and ability to wake up leisurely in the afternoon without the blaring sounds of an alarm) they have a natural respect for dreams. However, it is the logical people in my life -- the math professors, accountants, lawyers, and suit-and-tie wearing professionals who get up at the crack of dawn with an earth-shattering alarm who don't seem to recall their dreams, nor do they seem to put much stock in them.

But we all dream, and we all have problems. In fact, one way of looking at life is that it is a constant stream of problems to solve (or, for the Pollyannas of the world, we call them "opportunities"). And don't we all want to be better problem solvers? Wouldn't being an expert problem solver make even the most logic-based among us more peaceful and productive?

In my many TV and radio interviews I proselytize the value of dreaming and dream recall because I know from my personal experience, and from a decade and a half of working with clients, that dream recall improves people's lives. However, it is always exciting to me when a new study, much less one from Harvard, comes out to scientifically underscore what I've been evangelizing for years.

In a recent Harvard study researchers determined that one of the many functions of dreams is to problem solve. In this study volunteers practiced moving through a difficult three-dimensional maze in their waking state. Because of the difficulty of the maze, all the participants in this study performed poorly.

After working on the maze for a period of time, half the volunteers took a ninety-minute nap, while the other half stayed awake. Upon awakening, the participants who had a chance to sleep were asked to share their dreams. Half of the nappers recalled their dreams (all of which had something to do with a maze) while the half of the nappers reported not recalling any dreams.

Those that recalled their dreams were then able to complete the maze in half the time as those who did not nap and of those who did not remember their dreams.

The interesting thing is that none of the dreams that were remembered described a direct strategy for being able to master the maze. One person said he dreamed about seeing people along checkpoints in the maze and remembering a bat cave he had once toured. Another dreamed of searching for something in a maze. Someone else dreamed about the music that played along with the task.

The lesson may be that dreams don't necessarily have to make sense or be obvious to the awake mind to have a benefit in waking life.

"It might be that sleep is the time when the brain is tuned to find those types of association you wouldn't notice during waking," Dr. Stickgold said. "It's not that the dreams make no sense. They make wacky sense. If you're a student and you want to do better on the test, you might need to dream about it. The question is, 'How do I get myself to dream about it?' The answer is to get excited about it. That seems to be what you dream about."

What this study seems to imply is the sheer act of dream recall provided the dreaming participants a tremendous advantage as compared to those who didn't sleep, or didn't maintain a connection with their dream state.

"This study suggests that struggling with a task might be the trigger that prompts the sleeping brain to focus on the subject and work on getting better," explained the lead author, Robert Stickgold, a cognitive neuroscientist at Harvard Medical School.

I hope that this study hooks the attention of all of you "I don't have time to pay attention to my dreams" Type A personalities out there. Dream recall is not just for the airy-fairy, or artsy-fartsy types ... dream recall is for anyone who wants to up the ante of success and effectiveness in their lives, while (as an added bonus) raising your level of consciousness and intuition.

Then this begs the question, "How do I improve dream recall?" Don't worry my logic-based friend ... there will be a whole article dedicated to dream recall in this column...stay tuned!

What Do Our Recession-Themed Dreams Tell Us?

Even in the caveman days, people dreamed about what they were grappling with in their waking lives. While our Neanderthal brothers and sisters might have had visions of slobbering creatures chasing them out of their caves, today we may dream about economic issues, such as getting chased from our homes by a sinister lending institution.

Since the recession began, 8.5 million jobs have been lost, the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics reports an unemployment rate of 9.5 percent in February 2011, (12.3 percent in my home state of California), and more than 2.9 million homes are in foreclosure. The writing is on the cave wall. This recession is causing more people than ever to toss and turn with nightmares that reflect financial insecurity. Take a client of mine, who had the following dream:
"There was a party taking place on my front lawn and inside my house with surly strangers. It was like a home invasion -- they were completely taking over. I elbowed my way through the crowd and into the house where more surly strangers were lounging on my couch, eating my food ... acting like they owned the place! I screamed for them to get out but they didn't hear me ... I felt invisible, powerless, and furious."

Deirdre Barrett, a clinical psychologist who teaches at Harvard Medical School, recently talked to the "Los Angeles Times" about the recent uptick in recession-themed dreams. "We dream about what concerns us when we're awake," she tells the paper. "In bad times, that is likely to be about financial security." Other therapists, dream experts like me, leaders of dream groups, and those who monitor dream recording websites all concur.

Some of the scenarios that play out in many of these "recession dreams" include falling, being chased, having an empty wallet or a missing purse, teeth crumbling, someone kicking you out of your home or having a party in your home that you aren't invited to.

In dreams, your home represents your body, that which houses your basic sense of self. If you dream of domestic unsteadiness, be grateful for your dreams as they are doing the "inner house cleaning" you may not have the time nor the wherewithal to deal with in your waking life. Home (both as a symbol and as a reality) is part of our most primal aspect of self. It is where we go to feel safe, nurtured, fed and protected. Even if you don't see a foreclosure in your future, dreaming of a threat to your home can represent instability regarding your basic security, which, apparently, many of us are dreaming right now.

On the upside (yes, there is an upside), there are many studies that tell us, in spite of the unpleasant nature of these recession dreams, they are actually helping us to figure out solutions and supporting us to function at a higher level. This is why I always say, "There is no such thing as a bad dream." This phenomenon is called "sleepworking." One of the functions of sleepworking (and to nightmares in general) is to help us become better adapted to our environment.

According to Ann Veilleux, a therapist at Harmónia Madison Center for Psychotherapy, "A nightmare exposes things that perhaps you haven't expressed in your life--perhaps fears you didn't know you had," Veilleux said. "It's an outlet and also a way of learning about yourself."

Consider that recession nightmares serve two functions. They may be helping you rehearse for how you might handle a potential worst-case scenario. Or they are assisting you to vent limited beliefs, dysfunctional patterns, or traumas lodged deep in your psyche that no longer serve you. By working with these dreams (paying attention to them and acting on their advice), you might just glean the wisdom to avoid the disturbing scenario from happening in your waking life.

If you are one of the many people having recession dreams, ask yourself the following questions to understand what your dreams may be trying to tell you:

• Is there something I need to prepare for (an event, presentation, conversation, confrontation)?

• What preventative action should I take to position myself most advantageously regarding this situation (talk to a neighbor, research information about a class action lawsuit, redo the old resume, look for a new house)?

• What changes in my lifestyle am I being called to make (tapering down on frivolous spending, downsizing, moving to a new town)?

If you wake up in the middle of the night from one of these recession dreams/nightmares, write the dream down, make a to-do list of items you can do something concrete about the next day, and, finally, make a gratitude list.

Yes. You read that right.

If you fall asleep with a sense of gratitude for what you currently have-the blankets on your bed, a pen to write with, an ability to write, your ability to read, the electricity keeping you warm, even your ability to be grateful-the serotonin in your brain will begin to surge, which counterbalances the effects of stress hormone cortisol, which may be making you toss and turn, enabling you to get a more restful sleep...and hopefully more pleasant dreams.

If your recession dreams could speak, this is what they'd say, "Humans are in a constant state of change. Flow with it. Drop the baggage from your past that makes you too heavy to move quickly. Become related to the future that's beckoning you. Change is inevitable. Deal with it. Be grateful. If you can't beat 'em, you might as well join 'em...and enjoy the process."

If you do all this, you might reframe this recession from being a scary nightmare to being an exhilarating adventure. After all, a recession is really like a slingshot. You have to pull way back on the leather strap in order to send the pebble flying forward.

How to Feng Shui Your Way to Sweeter Dreams

If you desire to "sleep your way to success," you need to set yourself up for success by turning your dream zone into a dream sanctuary.

When you sleep you are in your most vulnerable, suggestible state of being. By preparing yourself (and your dream sanctuary) in the moments prior to sleep and upon awakening, you will discover one of the fastest ways to become a stronger dreamer, and in so doing, positively affect your waking.

Don't worry -- this can be done with just a few simple adjustments. As my friend Marie Diamond, the world famous feng shui expert says, "It is a whole lot easier to move furniture around than it is to change your mental programming."

According to the ancient Chinese system of feng shui, a dream sanctuary is one in which there is a harmonious flow of nourishing and sensual energy. It lures you in while evoking a peaceful-feeling tone of joyous well-being. In a dream sanctuary you feel nurtured, replenished and safe enough to let your guard down all the way, whether for a cat nap, a full-night's sleep or for passion beneath the sheets.

To create a dream sanctuary according to feng shui, you can use a variety of simple feng shui tips below as they relate to your five senses. To ensure a nourishing flow of energy, make sure your bed is in the commanding position in your room (an indirect view of the bedroom door from a reclining position where you sleep) and can easily be approached from both sides.

For a sense of safety and deep ease, ensure there isn't anything heavy hanging on the wall over your head or on the wall behind you while you sleep (i.e., a large mirror, framed piece of art or hanging plant).

To support a peaceful feeling of relaxation remove any electronic appliances like a TV, stereo, workout equipment or computers). If you must have them in the bedroom, then cover them with a swatch of attractive fabric or a room divider when not in use.

Your Sense of Sight:

• To promote balance, have bedside nightstands (tables) on each side of the bed.

• For a sense of calm and order, keep bedroom doors closed at night as well as the doors to an adjoining bathroom, closets and drawers.

• A warm, sensual environment is created by having dim lighting in the bedroom.

• Candles are a wonderful source of lighting; however, be sure to buy candles with no toxins.

• If possible use a dimmer switch to adjust the glow accordingly.

Use soothing colors to achieve a good feng shui balance in your bedroom. Many feng shui experts suggest that you use "skin colors" to achieve a feeling of peace and calm. (These colors range from pale white to rich chocolate brown ... whichever feels most soothing to you.)

Your Sense of Smell:

According to scientist, Boris Stuck, from University Hospital Mannheim in Germany, the quality of air in your bedroom is very important.

• To keep fresh air flowing in your dream sanctuary, open the windows and draw the shades during the day.

• If you are unable to open the windows, then get an air-purifier to keep the air fresh.

• Use essential oils and candles to create a pleasant scent in the air.

• Lavender or jasmine aromatherapy stimulates the mind/body connection to reduce stress levels, release positive energy, encourage healing and enhance sweet dreams.

Your Sense of Hearing:

• Allow white noise such as a fan or air purifier to block out jarring or distracting sounds.

• Ensure that if you listen to the radio or watch a television program, make sure that it is calming and empowering. The words you hear and the sounds you take in as you drift off to sleep are very important.

• In other words, don't fall asleep with the television on; the abrupt sounds such as slamming doors, sirens, or even the dialogue will disrupt you from having the most restful sleep possible.

Your Sense of Touch:

• For a secure feeling as you sleep make sure your bed has a good mattress, with solid headboard and high quality sheets from natural fibers that feel soft, fuzzy, or silky to your skin.

• For maximum comfort, adjust the temperature in the room (with additional blankets if it tends to be chilly or a fan if it tends to be cool) to make sure the air is just right for you.

(This one has nothing to do with feng shui ... but we can't leave your taste buds out of the equation, can we?)

• Make sure to brush your teeth before bedtime and use mouthwash to keep your breath as fresh as possible as you sleep ... especially after a midnight snack.

Your Sense of Taste:

• To quench your thirst in the middle of the night, make sure to have a glass of water by your bedside.

• Stay away from drinking fruit juice in the middle of the night, as the sugar creates an unpleasant aftertaste; that, of course, will affect your dreams.

The 9 Most Common Food Dreams and What They Really Mean

Are you on a diet and last night you dreamt about having your cake and eating it too (literally, the entire cake)?

Were you and Emeril Lagasse nibbling on meat and potatoes back in time in your childhood home?

Did you dine in a fancy French restaurant while being serenaded by a steak and lobster quartet?

The food you eat in your waking life as well as in your dreams reveals volumes about what you are chewing on in your life, the belief systems you are ingesting, the emotional connection you are hungering for, as well as the values you are feeding others.

On the physical level food enriches the body; on the mental level knowledge feeds the mind and soul. Food dreams represent values, customs, belief systems, influence, knowledge, and/or "food for thought". Your dream meal may reveal that you are starving for a hearty "meat and potato" commitment from your lover, or that you're tired of being devoured by your mother-in-law's will, or that you are struggling with losing those last belligerent twenty-pounds. In fact it probably won't come as a big surprise that people who are dieting tend to dream (by day and night) about food. But, even if you aren't on a diet, food is an important part of your life ... and one of the juiciest metaphors in the pantry of our dreams.

The following is an hors d'oeuvre sampling of common "food/eating dreams" to whet your appetite and stimulate your own deeper understanding of what your food dreams may be telling you. As they say in 12-Step programs, "Take what you want, and leave the rest behind." Translation: If it resonates, eat up! If it doesn't, leave it on the plate, or wrap it up in a doggie bag and share it with someone who might have a hankering for it.

1. I'm Starving!!!
If you dream of being hungry ask yourself what you are craving. You might be feeling deprived of time, attention, romance, quiet, stillness, recognition, or praise. Ask yourself what you need in order to even the scales: more sweetness in your life, more alone time, a creative outlet? Once you discover the missing ingredient, feast away!

2. Overdoing It
If you dream of "pigging out" then perhaps you've been in deprivation mode (aka dieting on twigs and berries) emotionally speaking. If that is the case then it should be no surprise that you are dreaming of eating the entire refrigerator. Inquire into healthy ways you can feed your self-esteem, creative stimulation, or praise for the aspects of your life that are really cooking. To shift feelings of scarcity, both in dreams and in your waking life, find creative ways to soulfully fill yourself up (i.e. melt in a hot bubble bath, adorn your bathroom mirror with gold stars, praise yourself with a gratitude list of 10 things you did well today, rock out to uplifting music...you get the idea.)

3. Fast Food
If you dream of "drive- through" dining then ask yourself where are you looking for a quick fix. Perhaps your dream is revealing your desire for instant gratification---the hunger for a particular result in your life without the willingness to cultivate a deeper level of care and attention. Fast food in dreams and in real life represent energy that if consumed over a long period of time could have diminishing returns for your body and your body of affairs. If this resonates as true, then open your mind to the big picture of your life and well-being. Life is long...and you need a healthy mind/body/spirit vehicle to carry you through the long-haul.

4. Veggies
We all know what Sigmund Freud would say if he knew you dreamed of eating carrots, celery, or cucumbers! More than a mere phallic symbol, dreams of vegetables represent self-love, strength, good health, and that you are taking care of your body's basic needs and well-being.

5. Yucky
If you dream of eating something unpalatable then ask yourself what in your life are you trying to make yourself stomach? Is there a relationship that is not feeding your soul or a job that isn't enriching your intellect?

6. Finger-Lickin' Gooooood
If you are enjoying a healthy dream meal, then you are allowing yourself to relish the fruits of your labor. You are being nourished by your life and you have a recipe for success ... feeling in control of your consumption from the menu of life. Follow the scent as you continue to move yourself in the direction of your most delicious destination.

7. Cooking Up Something Yummy
If you dream of being the one to dish it out, then you are the woman or man with a plan...with the energy and creativity to cook up a scheme. This dream can also represent your ability to take care of others and dish out emotional nourishment.

8. Difficult to Chew
If you dream you have a mouthful and are having a hard time swallowing or chewing, then you may be processing the ways in which you will deal with a challenging situation (also known as "sleepworking"). Good news, studies show that the sheer act of dreaming about a decision or difficult situation in your life means that you are gaining a creative edge on how you will approach this in the light of day.

9. Sweets for the Sweet
Of course, I'd save the best for last. If you dream of dessert, ice cream, cake, and other sweets, then it is time to celebrate a job well done and savor your just deserts. You are allowing yourself to have a sweet life. Conversely, you may be acting too sugary sweet in your life -- i.e, being disingenuous. If you are on a diet and you have this dream then you are having a calorie-free binge on what you've been depriving yourself of in real life.

Remember the old adage, "You are what you eat" ... that goes for food as well as your thoughts and belief systems. If your food dreams could talk they would say, "Be mindful of the thoughts you are ingesting. Feed your body/mind/spirit only that which empowers, fortifies, and uplifts you in the highest way. Feast on the nutrients that make you a vibrant match to the life of your dreams...because you're worth it!"

Oh yes, if you dream of eating a gigantic marshmallow then you may awaken to discover your pillow gone ... it happens.